I started writing that last post a couple weeks ago – and as I was writing, I kept thinking (as I often do about such things), “DON’T SAY THIS! YOU’LL JINX IT!”
But do I ever listen? Nooooooo… So I jinxed it, instead.
I started to write this a couple weeks ago, and I came back to it and edited to be about the fact that Nugget has been eating foods & had, in fact, eating three types already (and now 4, as I gave him broccoli last night.) But I did NOT edit the first paragraph or two about that wonderful, delightful sleep schedule of his. I THOUGHT, that since he’d been sleeping until at least 8 am for two weeks, that we were safe to assume this was, firmly, his schedule.
This kid is nothing, if not inconsistent. And I am bummed out. Especially since I’m smart enough (and paranoid enough) to never ever ever ever be lulled into a false sense of security.
It’s tremendously frustrating. Mr Nikki works long hours. Last night he didn’t get home until after 10pm. I’m exhausted, again, and tired, again, but I can’t go to bed early if I want to see him and eat dinner with him. (And, silly me, I really want to see him over sleeping or anything else, even things have been such lately that he thinks I don’t want to see him, but really it’s been such lately because I don’t see him that often and… well, that’s another post for another day.) So I stay up until he gets home. And I stay up to eat. And then we stay up because he has this thing about needing to “digest” (which I suppose makes sense) and unwind and all that… and then by the time I finally fall asleep it’s midnight or later. And then I wake up to pee. And then I wake up because a little Nugget has this occasional habit of yelling in his sleep or waking up to babble until I put a pacifier back in his mouth (though lately this has been an EVERY NIGHT habit). And then I can’t fall back asleep for awhile because I’m not someone who falls to sleep quickly.
AND because even though he doesn’t go to sleep until 10 or 11, he’s back to waking up before 7 again. 6:45. 6:30. I struggle with him for awhile, laying there in bed, replacing the pacifier, praying for another 30 minutes of sleep and getting spurts of 5 minutes in between babbling and sleep noises (from Nugget) until he makes noise so loudly & consistently that Mr Nikki gets him up to feed him. Nugget yawns all morning and falls back asleep for a couple hours not long after. So it’s not like he ISN’T TIRED and wouldn’t find it beneficial to just stay asleep until 8 or so.
I imagine this is just another of his phases. Though maybe the 8:00 am thing was the phase. I’m also sure that some of you may be rolling your eyes at me and saying, “Boo hoo,” because many people have to get up at 6:30 or earlier, anyway. Yeah, well… that doesn’t make me hate it any less, or feel any better when I wake up feeling hung over every morning.
Originally, we’d covered over the stupid skylights in our bedroom so it wasn’t so blindingly bright at the crack of dawn (something I hate,anyway and WHO THE HELL PUTS SKYLIGHTS OVER YOUR BED? BEDROOMS ARE FOR DARKNESS, DAMMIT!) and magically, he slept until 8 to 9 each morning. For two weeks. And now he isn’t, again. What can I possibly do to trick him, this time?
Though I know that would I really should be doing is figuring out, once and for all, why I always sleep so little & so shoddily. I’ve considered acupuncture (has anyone tried?) though I have to admit to myself that it’s most likely got something to do with my state of mind & the reason/s for a decade of therapy sessions.
The plan I’ve had in the back of my mind is to get up every morning (preferably before Nugget) at 7 so that I can go downstairs & do yoga, then make sure that Mr Nikki eats a proper breakfast every morning before work. If you noticed, I said I’d like to voluntarily get up at 7 – but I’m whining about Nugget waking up at 6:45. Why does 15 min make a difference? I’ve apparently got some kind of mental block about “6”. 6 anything is bad. It’s not like I’ve never had to get up early, either. I got up for work at 5:30-6, for over a decade. I didn’t like it, but I did it. Even in Prague, teaching English, there were mornings I had to get up at 5. (No, no, Prague was not a life of leisure.)
Anyway. Rant rant. My life is not so hard, I know. I’m aware of it’s many, many charmed qualities and never let myself forget how lucky I am. Sleep is just a thorn in my side and I hope Nugget goes back to his 8am ways.